Dreams = the fabulous resort where Austin & Shawna tied the knot, Desires (wedding-goer translation: Desirees) = the hopping club we spent most of our evenings at on the resort grounds and this post = the last (pause for tears...) about our adventures in Cabo for Austin & Shawna's nuptials. I know based on the previous 2 posts it probably looks like we spent the whole time being serious, devoted, wedding participants* with little to no time for fun** but I believe this post might paint a different picture.
After much deliberation, I've decided that there's absolutely no way to relay all the stories, laughs, jokes and funny moments in the detail they deserve and hold everyone's attention. So, in lieu of writing about 20 pages of single-spaced verbage, I will provide you all with a bulleted list of the lessons learned on this trip. What do you know- maybe this will be inspirational after all! (Cue "I believe I can fly").
* sarcasm font
** extreme sarcasm font
LESSONS FROM CABO:
- It is important to remember the difference between "bebidas" and "bambinos," lest you swim up to the pool bar after a few beverages and proclaim "Quiero bambinos!"
- The resort takes painting it's exterior VERY seriously
- If you enter the bellyflop competition - you may win diamond earrings but you also may get shown up by some 5 year olds. Be prepared.
- Remove all watches prior to breakdancing.
- Don't ask to buy hats on Mexican credit. It's not worth death stares for the whole week.
- Champagne glasses are the new shot glasses.
- Successful bartender motto: "If you can't beat them, let them behind the bar."
- Certain members of the wedding party have a real future as recording artists ("We're the 4 best friends that ANYONE could ever have.")
- If the bartender asks you not to dance on the wicker side table... he means it.
- My husband may leave me at some point in the future for the woman who makes juevos rancheros at Dreams. I pray she never finds her way to Katy.
- No one at a resort for a wedding should be allowed to participate in a tequila tasting.
- If you are participating in a tequila tasting and you don't want the last one - pour it on the ground rather than on the white seat cover.
- Rock, paper, scissors - just say no. Or "double or nothing."
- Dirty monkeys are delicioso.
- Certain wedding guests could have their own sitcom involving only a CB radio, their Spanish and a man named Alejandro.
- If Ryan knew he only had 1 week to live he would attempt to do so in a whale's belly.
- Mexican wrestling masks constitute formal wear.
- "Beat up" is not a compliment to girls in bikinis.
- The Explorer Club is kind of serious about that whole "only children on the trampoline" thing.
Price for a beer outside the Cabo airport: $5. Price for a beer on the shuttle to the resort: $3. Knowing you weren't beverage-less for those 10 yards: priceless.
Los Suenos!
Ohhhh, I miss it.
The adult pool. In case you weren't sold on the main pool.
Yes, please.
Ryan is high society.
It's cropped so you can't see it in it's full glory - but Melanie got a STEAL on that handbag.
Safety equipment? We don't need no stinkin' safety equipment.
Eh. I suppose this view will do.
This photo serves to document the moment Ryan fell in love.
Ready to chase some tail of the whale variety.
Loveeeeeeers.
2 of the best friends anyone could ever have.
Oh hey David! Didn't mean to interrupt your senior pictures back there.
So nautical.
Heeeey guys.
Hi friend!
Window to the pacific.
If you've got it- flaunt it, right?
Cabo arches > Golden arches.
I'll never let go, Jack.
David and the fierce competition. Age boundaries have no place in the world of belly flopping.
Iiiiiii just wanna flllllly.
Nothing like a pina colada to celebrate a solid victory over David and the youth of Dreams.
Rub a dub dub, 3 hotties in a tub. (I'm cringing at my cheesiness too, don't worry.)
So much prettier than the American version of this.
Paper, rock, scissors in action.
New amigos.
Booty dancing with paper Shawna. DUUUUUH.
Self taken balcony pic to start the day.
Whuddup, beach?
I believe he's explaining to Caitlin where babies come from.
Just another day at the office. With blue drinks.
I would like to say this is before the tequila tasting started but it could just be that we ran off the other attendees.
You guys look beat up.
It was time for the kids to nap anyway.
Were you worried the boys weren't having any fun?
Rough day golfing on such an unattractive course.
You can take the boys out of highschool, but you can't take the highschool out of boys.
So proud.
Fireside chatting.
Jonathan made this face before he even realized he was in for the ride of his life.
"Como se dice Co-pilot?"
Dos Alejandros Shuttles - coming to a city near you.
Cabo Wabo.
It's important to stay well limber on these long vacations.
Finders are not keepers when it comes to the lady undergarments at Cabo Wabo.
Sign of a successful evening out. (Successful is a relative term).
Peace, love and Desirees.
E'rybody dance now.
Peace was apparently very important to us on this trip.
I think I'll end it on this one. Going out on top... of a bar.
Never forget.
