Just Another Day in Paradise

In re-adjusting to life as a working Mama to a newborn, so many memories of going back to work and all the things necessary to make the Martin household machine function have come rushing back.  Little things I thought were permanently etched in my brain have somehow been buried beneath a flood of new adorable quirks.  

With the first bambino everything seems like it will last forever and with the second you have both the gift, and weight, of realizing that life as a parent is a series of phases.  Each of them is awesome and difficult in it's own ways.  You think you'll remember all the nuances forever and realize that each of them is constantly being replaced by new ones.  There simply isn't enough mental real estate to house them all... at least not in my little pea-brain!  It's also highlighted for me just how QUICKLY things change and evolve when you have tiny humans in your life.  

These facts made me realize that while I do a pretty good job of capturing the big, exciting events in our lives, the daily grind gets completely ignored here.  In an attempt to try to right this wrong, I decided to pick a day to document so that when I look back on the story of our life we'll have a snippet of what this season looked like in the moments that are typically ignored by Pintrest.  

I intended to pick an average day although everyone knows that there's no such thing either as a mother or an employee... or just a human if we are being honest.  Basically what wound up happening was the first day that I actually remembered to start documenting my morning was the day that won the lottery.  Without further adieu, let's take a look at how Wednesday March 25th 2015 went down, huh?

• 4:15 - Phone alarm goes off.  My brain laughs.
• 4:33 - Silently admit defeat to the man and get out of bed.
• 4:38 - Pump sesh #1 starts.  I catch up on the most important things on my To Do list - trolling my Instagram feed and catching up on my Trivia Crack.
• 4:54 - Finish cleaning parts and packing my "Mom bag" as my coworker affectionately termed it for the day.
• 5:06 - Finish making my lunch AND breakfast #1.. drumroll please...Instant Breakfast with milk.  I hear this is how Winston Churchill used to start his days also.
• 5:17 - Take my allergy pill & prenatal vitamin.  If it's Spring in Houston and I haven't taken my allergy pill, I would steer clear of me.
• 5:18 - Hop in the shower.  
• 5:30 - Get out of the shower.  Greeted by a chorus of baby dinosaur noises signifying that Brynn is awake.  Wonder WTF and pray Ryan handles the situation.
• 5:42 - Make the biggest decision I make each morning- to blow dry or not to blow dry?  Decide that I'm feeling ambitious and opt to blow dry and straighten.
• 5:52 - Have a moment of silence for the abundant loss of my pregnancy hair.  Thanks for nothing, prenatal horse pill vitamin.
• 5:55 - Weigh  myself.  0.00005 seconds later completely regret that decision.
• 6:00 - Hear Ryan's alarm clock.  Take note of how amazed I am that I can hear it over the loud hand-sucking noise coming from Brynn's pack n' play.  
• 6:01 - Try to find something to wear.  Wonder why I don't have more clothes.  Wonder how long maternity wear is acceptable to keep in your clothing rotation.  (It's so comfy, y'all!)
• 6:04 - Look in the mirror and decide that things are as good as they're getting for the day.  Is "Mom hair don't care" applicable to one's entire physical appearance?  I've adopted that mantra.  

• 6:05 - Ryan changing Brynn's diaper so I run upstairs to find her an outfit.  
• 6:08 - Wander into the kitchen for element #2 of breakfast - iced coffee.  Best part of waking up is caramel iced coffee in my cuuuuup!
• 6:14 - Feed the Brynn-cess and attend to more high priority items (read: The Skimm, Blogs, etc).
• 6:38 - Brynn falls asleep on me.  Thanks, love.

• 6:39 - Ryan is in the kitchen making his lunch.
• 6:45 - Announce to Ryan that I have found our future home.  Only problems are that it's outside of our price range and search area.  Oh and we aren't looking.  Details.
• 6:47 - Ryan goes upstairs to wake Emery.
• 6:55 - Ryan changes Emery's diaper.  I brush my teeth.
• 6:57 - Ryan gets Emery dressed.  Questions aloud whether wrestling a wet pig might be easier.
• 7:00 - I do Emery's hair.  Wonder how celeb hairdressers do it.  Bc obviously this is a simliar situation.  Wrestle the shoes she feels strongly about wearing on to her feet.  Try to convince her she is not Stevie Wonder and sunglasses inside are a faux pas.

• 7:05 - Emery gives Lola her treat... via a pitch to the face.
• 7:09 - All bags and humans are safely in the appropriate vehicles.  Children with Daddy.  Enough bags to open a (non brand name) Prada store with me.

• 7:18 - Deliver what is no doubt a Grammy-worthy performance of "Time of Our Lives."  Sang both NeYo & Pitbull's parts- clearly this constitutes the day's cardio.
• 7:39 - Pull into garage.  Realize I have forgotten my badge.  *sigh*
• 7:48 - Set down at desk after depositing lunch & la leche in the fridge.
• 7:51 - Text Ryan to see how drop off went.
• 8:04 - Eat my oatmeal (breakfast part #3) at coworker's desk while discussing an email that came in over night.  Looking back she probably did not appreciate the overwhelming maple smell at her desk.  SORRY M!
• 8:48 - Frantically trying to update and input new information for forecast elements that have changed for a forecast meeting at 9.
• 8:58 - Can't get printer to work because I forgot my badge.  Had to get coworker to help me.  I'm worthless.
• 9:26 - Hurriedly cut out of a meeting early to try to hightail it to the building next door for a meeting at 9:30.
• 10:33 - Sit back down in my chair.
• 10:40 - Cleaned out my oatmeal cup and get my snack.
• 10:45 - Pump sesh #2.  Eat my snack work.  Having your lady bits out at work, no matter how concealed you are, will never be normal to me.

• 11:08 - Parts cleaned and all items stowed away.  
• 12:01 - Lunch time!
• 12:03 - Gave in and put my jacket on.  I try to make it as long as possible each day before I give in to the tundra that is this end of our floor.
• 2:00 - Meeting gets delayed at the last minute.
• 2:32 - 2:00 Meeting actually starts.  Fly through information because there's a 3:00 meeting.
• 3:02 - Run next door.  Don't tell HSE.  
• 4:22 - Sit down for pump sesh #3.  Eat snack #2.

• 5:27 - Pull out of the garage.
• 5:29 - Call my Mom to catch up.  She informs me she has found a puzzle piece from 2 weeks prior in the side of her purse.  
• 5:59 - Pull into the girls' school parking lot.  The girls' teachers each tell me a story that completely summarizes their personalities.  Brynn's teacher tells me about something that made her laugh during the day while Emery's tells me about something that Emery refused to let her do.
• 6:10 - Put Emery in time out in the daycare parking lot.  No shame in my game.  It was completely ineffective, btw.
• 6:14 - Pull out of the school parking lot.
• 6:19 - Pull into our driveway.  I hit all green lights- wheeee!
• 6:29 - Prepare Emery's snack (gooooo feeeeesh) one-handed because Brynn wasn't down with her carseat.  Or waiting patiently.  
• 6:30 - Get changed.  Brynn fusses her disapproval of my putting her down.  (She usually does this in the evenings because she's hungry)
• 6:36 - Sit down to feed Brynn.
• 6:37 - Emery demands "animoes" on TV.

• 6:43 - Ask Emery to kindly stop using her broom to brush her sister's hair.
• 6:51 - Daddy's home!
• 6:55 - Emery proudly announces a #2.  Ryan takes her into the bedroom to change her.
• 6:57 - Brynn done eating.
• 6:59 - Ryan makes Emery dinner (milk, turkey, sweet potato fries and peas+carrots)
• 7:04 - I start washing and sanitizing pump and bottle parts while making bottles for the next day.  I wonder if I was very nice to science if it would allow me the powers Samantha possessed on Bewitched.
• 7:20 - Daddy puts Emery in timeout.  I can't even remember why.  Probably not listening.  
• 7:26 - I finish washing parts & putting together bottles.
• 7:28 - Daddy takes Brynn and monitors Emery's living room clean up chores while I run upstairs to find some jammies and start to run a bath.
• 7:31 - After much bartering about what does not belong in the bath (anything that isn't Emery), sI uccessfully wrangle her into the tub.
• 7:42 - Get Emery out of the bath.  Attempt to get her in a towel.  Probably looks similar to calf roping but with a towel.
• 7:44 - The calf demands "polly, polly" which translates to potty.  Set her on the potty.  Nothing happens.
• 7:51 - I put Emery in timeout.  For not listening.  Sound famliar?
• 7:56 - Emery's teeth AND Uma's teeth are brushed.  Pat them on the butt and usher them into the living room to go pick out a book.

• 7:57 - Emery has selected "Grandma Book" (actually titled The Napping House) which I know Ryan is pumped about (sarcasm font).  We swap kids.
• 7:58 - Ryan takes Emery upstairs and I take Brynn to the bedroom where I get her diaper changed and weigh her.  14 lbs 2 oz.  Mama not thrilled.
• 8:02 - Put Brynn's jammies on.
• 8:05 - Sit down to feed Brynn.
• 8:06 - Daddy surfaces from Bedtime Stallville, population: 1.  He goes into the kitchen to start dinner. (Salmon scampi, rice, peas+carrots)  
• 8:11 - Dramatic crying from the monitor.  I wonder if Emery will be an actress.  Think of LiLo.  Vow not to let that ever happen.
• 8:13 - Hubby & I start up the DVr.  Select Real World vs Road Rules Challenge.  Because we are classy folks.
• 8:17 - Give up feeding Brynn.  Sit her up and let her look around.  Observing > Eating in her world.

• 8:25 - Emery finally asleep.
• 8:33 - Brynn asleep.
• 8:38 - I transfer Brynn to pack n' play so I can eat.
• 8:39 - Enjoy dinner by TV light with the hubs.  Ahhh, modern day romance.

• 9:10 - Clean up the kitchen.  Salmon was packed in an oven safe disposable dish.  10 points for us!
• 9:14 - Unpack a new piece of wall art that was delivered.
• 9:19 - Eat dessert that I shouldn't be eating.
• 9:25 - Pump sesh #4.  This one is usually my least favorite because I'm exhausted.  I ALWAYS have to give myself a stern pep talk to make sure I don't quit.
• 9:42 - Tell myself I'm awake enough to lay down on the couch without falling asleep.
• 946 - Ryan tells me I'm falling asleep.  Doh.
• 9:48 - Ryan gives Lola a treat and I head to the bathroom for my adult bedtime routine.
• 9:59 - Contacts: out, face: washed, teet: brushed, feet: cloaked in fuzzy socks that aren't required for Houston Springs
• 10:05 - Turn on my alarm, put my UP in sleep mode and call it a day.